Every year has its ups and downs, but 2020 has been hilariously bad. On top of a pandemic, civil rights movement prompted by the murders of innocent black people, and a political disaster caused by Republicans; we also had to deal with social media trying to tell us how to take care of ourselves. Posts ranging from: “don’t feel bad that you have gained weight, people are dying” to “YOU NEED xyz to feel better”… We swung into this weird world where people who have an instagram and twitter became reputable professionals who should be listened to and worshipped for their advice that LITERALLY no one asked for. Entire podcasts were created to tell people what to do by people who barely have college degrees. Psychological diagnosis was left to the people who used the biggest words to tell people what trauma they were experiencing, and how they could fix it with oils, vitamins, and drugs. 2020 also brought unsolicited commentary to people who were trying to forget how awful this year was. Anyone who went on a road trip or saw friends was instantly attacked or lectured for just trying to get through this time- and don’t get me wrong, they deserved criticism, but from who? Strangers on the internet? Why the hell would they listen to you?

2020 was the year where we all pretended to be mental health experts, epidemiologists, estheticians, and political scientists. We all did it, and there is no shame in having interests, but to speak with such authority was cringey at best. Looking back on this year also allowed me to dive deeper into previous years, where I trauma bonded with people thinking that it was healthy, or I diagnosed myself with different mental illnesses rather than seeking medical help. This needs to stop, and I am putting an end to it now.

I am no longer taking advice from people who just want to sell me something. I am done listening to friends who suggest things that I have never found interesting. I am done asking for advice from people who don’t have my same values. Instead of actively seeking advice from my peers about my mental health, politics, and social justice, I am going to do my own research and keep my opinions to myself and to those who ask for it. This blog will continue to be my outlet for ideas, short stories, and favorite things, but I will no longer play this toxic game of pretending to hold credentials that people work their asses off for.

I don’t want relationship advice. I don’t want your tv/movie recommendations. I don’t want to hear about your politics. I am tired, and in 2021, I would like a break from shitty advice and opinions. I want to be less negative which means avoiding people who seem to thrive off of toxic traumatic headlines. 2020 taught me life is precious and all too short, and that I need to start focusing on things that bring me joy and fill my cup. So join me in ending this weird acting game we have put on this year. Let’s all start to educate ourselves and listen to those who know what they are doing rather than pretending that because we read one paragraph of an essay penned by someone with an honorary doctorate that we know everything about the topic. Opinions are like assholes, and everyone’s got one; it doesn’t mean we need to talk out of them.